8 Guys You’ll Meet On Grindr (And Other Gay Apps)

  1. What you need to know about gay dating apps
  2. The note
  3. stalkers
  4. flashing lights
  5. art collectors
  6. three crowd
  7. Incognitos
  8. Static Trailers
  9. cheaters
  10. The one you’ve been waiting for

What you need to know about gay dating apps

While it may seem easy to find a compatible boyfriend or partner on gay apps given the wide variety of options, finding someone who is emotionally and physically available is a whole different challenge. Across the many options, from Boyahoy and Grindr to Growlr and Scruff, people are endless, but their personalities easily fall into one of eight different categories.

The note

Parents, if you want to know more about the Grindr app your son has on his phone, we have a parent guide to Grindr that has all the details you need to know.


If you’ve been on a gay app for a while, you know the stalker well: they’re active all night, looking at your profile and your photos without saying a word.

You often see stalkers on your visitor list, even early in the morning, but you can never see them in action, or worse, get blocked when you try to counter them.

If the stalker is too intimidating for you, try blocking them from accessing your profile. This is a feature in most dating apps and the other person doesn’t even get a notification; they will just think you deleted your profile.

flashing lights

Love them or hate them, the flasher is a prominent part of the gay community and they are not shy about showing a little skin.

Whether they open their photos without any kind of greeting or abruptly interrupting a conversation, the flash is provocative and strikes without warning.

To deal with the flash, you can try a simple approach: ask them to stop. If that doesn’t work, use the app lock feature to curb harassment; most dating apps support some method of blocking users.

Another option to prevent someone from referring you to a dating app is to report a violation to the service. Even if a few people do this, chances are they will look at it and take action such as deleting the dating site’s profile.

art collectors

The flip side of the flash, but perhaps even more annoying, is the art collector. This is a gay app user who doesn’t want to see your portfolio.

These people tirelessly try to see you.

  • “Can you unlock your photos?”

  • “Do you have more pictures?”

  • “Where are your nudes?”

As with most dating app abuse cases, simply blocking this user is enough to stop the messages.

three crowd

The guys that make up this app user community aren’t necessarily bad people, but if you’re looking for a friend or romantic connection, they might not be available, and that can get confusing in the blink of an eye as well.

“Three is a crowd” are those who have already partnered, maintained an open relationship, or are simply looking for friends while keeping in touch. Use caution unless you are in situations where there are no chains.


A secret agent usually has something to hide on gay apps without a visible photo or some sort of abstract, illustrated or otherwise unidentifiable image, such as a wall or their bed.

The user may do this for a number of reasons such as not yet officially disclosing their sexuality, that they may be in a relationship but are afraid of getting caught or concerned about being identified by co-workers/boss/students, etc.

These users can be very nice, emotionally available people, but still it is wise to be careful. The last thing you want is to talk to them for weeks, months or even longer so that they are always too scared to date for fear of going out.

Static Trailers

Sugary sweet, and it’s always nice to say that these boys next door can seem like a good thing at first, until you realize they don’t know how to stop.

Static cleaners always have a message waiting for you and a compliment to share. Feeling desirable is nice, but watch out for signs of low self-esteem and compulsive behavior that make them unfit for a relationship.


If you’ve ever heard of the TV show CatFish, you know that there are plenty of cheaters on the Internet: people who pretend to be someone else for the “pleasure” of chatting with someone online.

Believe it or not, there are more women on gay apps than you might think. This includes everyone from a guy’s best friend looking for a potential match on their behalf, to lesbians (and even other guys) who love to play games with guys.

While it’s impossible to tell who is an impostor and who isn’t, using common sense and taking precautions with your images and information will help you stay safe in the long run.

The one you’ve been waiting for

Yes, it’s true, the man of your dreams could very well be one of the people you meet on the gay app. Unfortunately, a common stereotype is that these apps are just for connecting.

In reality, they wouldn’t have the “friends”, “talk”, “dating” or even “love” options if that were the case! Don’t be discouraged by seven other species that may hold you back on your quest. It may now be on your favorite apps list.

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